The Skymall catalogue is something to behold, an impressive presentation of what can most accurately be described as a big ole pile o' crap. While it's hard to imagine that anyone actually purchases any of the aforementioned crap, Skymall's annual revenue is thought to exceed $100 million (holy crap!).
Although I have never made a purchase (and likely never will), I do love to spend time combing through the catalogue, paying more attention to the more outrageous offerings.
- Skel-e-gnomes - Because sometimes, regular gnomes just aren't whimsical enough.
- The Human Slingshot - A game. Where you launch yourself into other players. Why, you ask? Why not!
- Align 'N Drive Kit - Stickers. To help you locate your front tires. If you can't find your fucking front tires, stickers aren't going to help.
- Hanukkah Tree Topper - Somewhere, Jesus is rolling over in his grave. Or is he???
- Upright Sleeper - Makes this guy look normal.
- Jeans Lounge Pants - Makes jeggings look normal.
- Ketchup & Mustard pillows - Ketchup & Mustard pillows are a fun accent for any room. Said no one ever.
- Drunk Cat - "This painting would look great in our living room!" Said no one ever.
- One of a Kind Shirt - "Honey, I love it!" Said no man ever.
- Pierogi ornament - If this is your family heirloom, your family sucks.